Joke of The Week for Week Ending June 1, 2007

Ask me Why....

 Why do  we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?                                                              
Why  do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough  money?                                                        
Why  does some one believe you when you say there are four billion stars,  
but check  when you say the paint is wet?                     
Why  do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?        
Why  doesn't Tarzan have a beard?                                          
Why  does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver  at him?                                                          
Why  do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?                                      
Whose  idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?                      
If  people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?                    
Why  is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are  always  white?                                                            
Is  there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?                      
Why  do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to  eat will have materialized?                              
Why  do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum  cleaner,  then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to  give  the vacuum one  more chance?                                        
Why  is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?  
How  do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?            
When  we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes  for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't  all right, so why  don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"  
Why  is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table  you always manage to knock something else over?                                                                                             
In  winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer  when we  complained about the heat?                                        
How  come you never hear father-in-law jokes?                              
And  my FAVORITE...... The  statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is  suffering from  some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're  okay, then it's you.                

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Revised: January 01, 2010

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