Joke of The Week for Week Ending
April 13, 2007
Demographics of American Newspapers:
1. The Wall Street Journal is read
by the people who run the country.
2. The Washington Post is read by
people who think they run the
3. The New York Times is read by
people who think they should run the
country and who are very good at
4. USA Today is read by people who
think they ought to run the country
but don't really understand The New
York Times. They do, however, like
their statistics shown in pie
5. The Los Angeles Times is read by
people who wouldn't mind running the
country -- if they could find the
time -- and if they didn't have to
leave Southern California to do it.
6. The Boston Globe is read by
people whose parents used to run the
country and did a far superior job
of it, thank you very much.
7. The New York Daily News is read
by people who aren't too sure who's
running the country and don't really
care as long as they can get a seat
on the train.
8. The New York Post is read by
people who don't care who's running
the country as long as they do
something really scandalous,
preferably while intoxicated.
9. The Miami Herald is read by
people who are running another
country but need the baseball
10. The San Francisco Chronicle is
read by people who aren't sure there
is a country . . . or that anyone is
running it; but if so, they oppose
all that they stand for. There are
occasional exceptions if the leaders
are handicapped minority feminist
atheist dwarfs who also happen to be
illegal aliens from any other
country or galaxy, provided of
course, that they are not
11. The National Enquirer is read by
people trapped in line at the
12. The Pensacola News Journal is
read by people who have recently
caught a fish and need something in
which to wrap it.
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