Joke of The Week for Week Ending June 1, 2001
Texas White House
The White House is not just getting a new team, but a
whole new language.
George W. Bush will be bringing with him many friends from Texas, and for anyone not born in the Lone Star State, the Texan accent and the cowboy colloquialisms can seem a bit strange.
Here is a guide to a few of the more colorful expressions you may encounter:
1. The engine's runnin' but ain't nobody driving = Not overly intelligent.
2. As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party (self-explanatory).
3. Tighter than bark on a tree = Not very generous.
4. Big hat, no cattle = All talk and no action.
5. We've howdied but we ain't shook yet = We've made a brief acquaintance, but not been formally introduced.
6. He thinks the sun come up just to hear him crow = He has a pretty high opinion of himself.
7. She's got tongue enough for ten rows of teeth = That woman can talk.
8. It's so dry the trees are bribin' the dogs = We really could use a little rain around here.
9. Just because a chicken has wings doesn't mean it can fly = Appearances can be deceptive.
10. This ain't my first rodeo = I've been around awhile.
11. He looks like the dog's been keepin' him under the porch = Not the most handsome of men.
12. They ate supper before they said grace = Living in sin.
13. Time to paint your butt white and run with the antelope = Stop arguing and do as you're told.
14. As full of wind as a corn-eating horse = prone to boasting.
15. You can put your boots in the oven, but that doesn't make them biscuits = You can say whatever you want about something, but that doesn't change what it is.
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Revised: January 01, 2010